Bob versus Uri and the Stolen Uncle Part One

Fighting Words Dublin, Maynooth Boys National School, 5th Class, 22nd September 2026

There once was a fish with legs named Bob. His arch nemesis, Uri the Uruguayan smuggler, captured his Jamaican uncle Jami D, in a land far far away.

Jami D was in a fortress guarded by the smuggler’s army of potatoes. So Bob and his friend Smirnoff teamed up to save his uncle Jami D.

To defeat Uri, you have to get a golden potato. George Pigeonton the Pigeon guarded the Golden Potato.

They set out on a journey to the fortress. Smirnoff had bird food to feed George Pigeonton. You have to give Smirnoff a lot of beans to get the pigeon food.

They had a portable submarine vehicle, shaped like a cat, named Sir Cattington Way. They travelled to Puerto Rico.

They found Sir Pigeonton at the top of a mountain. They met a rat named Jonathan who had the beans and loved cheese puffs. There was a bean gun, and you could load beans into it, it would shoot the beans.

The potato was in a safe box. To open it, you had to say “banana.” The bean gun’s owner was Auntie Bean, the wife of the Jamaican uncle. She had a moustache.

They were on the submarine to Puerto Rico, and then they were going to go through the sewage system.

They met Auntie Bean and they got the beans. Then they went up the mountain.

They met one of Uri’s potato guards, who was trying to stop them from getting the Golden Potato.

Auntie Bean threw the bean gun to Bob and he annihilated the potato guard.

When they got to the smuggler’s fortress, they found the smuggler.

Bob started asking the smuggler questions. He turned around and Smirnoff pointed the gun at him...